Chongqing is widely known as a gateway to the Yangtze River where one can travel a short distance and take in sweeping views of the ever popular Three Gorges Dam, enjoy the Dazu Rock Carvings, or feast on some mild Sichuan cuisine. However, what most of you probably don’t know is that a sex-based theme park was recently constructed there: LOVE LAND! The park’s founder said that this glorious wonderland was meant to educate the naive Chinese about the hushed subject of sex. Just imagine, somewhere in China there are huge sculptures of genitalia and a roller-coaster ride with carts designed as over-sized thong-wearing derrieres. It comes as no surprise that this park has been shut down before its grand opening, scheduled in October 09.

The park was meant to be more than just a taboo freak show. The founders really wanted to liberate the Chinese and hopefully melt those frosty granny panties to reveal hot little thongs. Love Land was also equipped to provide sex seminars. Perhaps it shut down because the government was worried that an increased number of throat donkey cases would be mistaken for swine flu symptoms, causing mass panic. However, the South China Morning Post reported that the government supposedly shut down the park because the founders did not have a building permit, but we all know better. I’d like to propose a few reasons, aside from the obvious, that may persuade the Chinese to keep the park open:

1. Economic boost as Chongqing welcomes an increased number of fellow pervs travelers.
2. Sex toy industry alone makes up for +20% drop in Chinese exports over the past months.
3. FDI inflow from the UK as the park enlightens Chinese men to start seeking bigger breasted women (an entirely different kind of butter-face) to partake in some motorboat action.

As tragic as it is that this park shall never be, at least we still have Loveland, South Korea. A magical island, once a popular honeymoon destination, where cascading cock is A-OK.