So it’s an internet-everything-age. We either farm virtually, retweet everything mashable.com tells us or we threaten to sue others for some bullshit that nobody cares about. People from our Big Bro’s side are a bit more innovative; they started venerating their ancestors online some years ago. Of course, our local IT guys are second to none in creativity: they now give us online petitioning.

In a special meeting regarding the facilities of the new Legco building, Samson Tam proposed adding a virtual petition system, where people can launch their petition to the Legco members online. Samson’s long time rival, Charles Mok, immediately pointed out that the Professional Commons (an organization which Charles was one of the founders of) proposed the same idea back in 2008. Knowing that the Internet Tough Guys in Hong Kong love to sue people over trivial important issues, I wonder if Charles would like to file another lawsuit against Samson, just like what he did after losing to Samson in the Legco election (the lawsuit he lost as well by the way).

Now of course, online petitioning is nothing new; it was introduced overseas back in 1999. I’m more concerned about the strategy of LSD in this new platform. You see, the three angry LSD legislators created a whole new sub-culture in local politics: banana politics. Would the online petition platform suit their style?

I hope the IT guys will add a “throw things” function on the platform, so that LSD can do what they do best there. To add more fun, there should be a “dodge” or “parry” function for the officials. This would make the online petition platform fairer to our mavericks at LSD, as I told you earlier that the pro-establishment DAB is exceptionally good at mobilising “supporters.” Our boys from DAB could easily get thousands of people clicking on any ass-kissing petitions they launch via the deployment of cheap snake banquets and tour treats like the ones here, here and here. Not convinced? Then please tell me where to find HK$ 150 half-day tours that include a serpent for dinner.

Then again, having bananas in an online petition is highly unlikely. The people DAB could bribe mobilize are not likely to be that tech-savvy. If our social media gurus could take online petitioning viral, they might actually deserve this self-proclaimed status.

Henry has a weekly guest post on The Dark Side. He is one of the founders of the Libertines Pub and also writes for Global Voices Online.