HK people love drama so much that we rush home to stare attentively every evening for shows as retarded as this one. So if you like this stuff as much as your peers, I now ask you for a favour. When there’s a by-election for the seats of the five resigning pan-democrats in a few weeks time -and if you have the chance to vote- vote them back in no matter what!

Cardinal Joseph Zen Ze-kiun earlier urged us to vote for the pan-dems even if we hate Wong Yuk-man’s guts (LSD), just to make sure our voices heard by the government and Big Bro in Beijing. Now usually a man of faith should not be trusted and I understand you may want to take this opportunity to get rid of the annoying pan-dems for wasting a lot of taxpayer money. BUT DON’T DO IT! Listen to the Cardinal for once. Why? Because these pan-dems are as essential as the asskissing pro-establishment camp in the making of this grand drama called the LegCo.

These democrats threw bananas in the LegCo chamber. They filibustered in the Finance Committee of LegCo for the Express Rail funding and are incapable of having a civilized argument. When the five wanted to deliver their resignation speeches two days ago, they had irritated the ass kissers so much that the pro-Beijing boys needed to walk out and adjourn the meeting. Even Wong Kwok-hing from the pro-establishment Hong Kong Federation of Trade Unions copied the LSD way of doing things: he shouted his way out calling the pan-dems shameful (at 1:05 of this clip). Together with the sad pro-establishment camp, the pan-dems are there to make this thing called LegCo a joke, and hence funny. We all know this institution can’t do shit, as even the most ridiculous proposal from Bowtie will be passed anyway due to the carefully designed LegCo voting system. Following the happenings there is now a must watch drama at work (webcasted here by RTHK weekly!).

Face it people. The one country, two systems policy still means Beijing dictates our affairs. Recent examples here and here. So let’s enjoy the ride and at least be entertained occasionally! Vote the pan-dems back on stage. It’s only a matter of CHOICE.

Henry has a weekly guest post on The Dark Side. He is one of the founders of the Libertines Pub.

We always knew that Filipinos were amongst the best movers in Asia by a landslide, with even inmates capable of some impressive moves. Hence, it’s not really a surprise that a new tribute to Michael Jackson by these same rapists and killers has received + 1.7 million hits since last Friday already. Unfortunately it isn’t nearly as entertaining as their earlier work of Thriller, where one inmate in particular very accurately plays a girl who is being “thrilled.” On the other hand, this new release has gone for the gusto and incorporated MJ’s choreographer and a couple of his dancers too.

We guess times got tough for the crew after he kicked the bucket and the Filipino prison was happy to help out. The irony of the Philippines’ reputation for underage sex rings combined with a prison-tribute to Michael Jackson doesn’t escape us. But hey, kudos to the guards for giving criminals a chance to shake what their momma gave them and receive worldwide praise and recognition for it. Enjoy.

As speak, an official envoy sent by “His Holiness” the Dalai Lama is in Beijing to resume talks with the Chinese government. Academics are saying that our Buddhist friends will offer concessions, as they have realized by now that nobody really gives a crap about their cause partially because they are a bunch of raging hypocrites, especially since China is nowadays able to tell the rest of the world to bend over. Granted, the Dalai Lama has stated that all he wants for Tibet is a “meaningful” autonomy, instead of independence. Let’s hope he learned from November 2008 when the Chinese spat on a document offered by a previous envoy, containing a proposal for greater autonomy in Tibet and four other provinces. Of course TDS is all for world peace in Tibet and neighboring regions, if only to shut up the Tibet activists of this world. Avoiding a nuclear holocaust would be a bonus.

Hong Kong is a safe town, not in the least due to our bad ass cops. Even in the face of blatant aggression from truly dangerous and fearsome characters, they maintain their cool. We owe them for beating up triads who provide us with cheap DVDs, messing with our gay community and locating compensated daters. They do tend to get horny sometimes, but who doesn’t? Now of course there are exceptions. After about 35 seconds in the below video you will see an officer whose dive would be worthy of inclusion on the instruction DVD for World Cup referees this summer. Hey Martin, seems they can also be found inside the force!

Update: Judging from her attitude, we could have known this woman is a somebody: Amina Mariam Bokhary is the niece of a Court of Final Appeal judge, Mr. Justice Kemal Bokhary. This is the 3rd time she got arrested for assaulting a police officer. Earlier she has gotten away with minimal fines (HKD 1.000) and community service. We wonder why..

After yesterday’s informative post, it’s time to bring back the unnecessary crap which in no way enriches your life. After Bus Uncle, Crazy Woman Misses Her Flight and I Want My Damn Shark Fin Soup, we present you the latest local drama: “Miss Leggy vs. 4 Eyes Pork Chop: the fight for a guy.” Synopsis: ex-girlfriend bumps into ex-boyfriend with new girlfriend and starts a fight, interrogating the ex for an explanation about her being dumped for 4 Eyes Porky. Classy stuff indeed:

Lines in this fascinating conversation include:

“Who is this? Answer me! You didn’t dump me for this chick! What does she have that I don’t have? She’s got face? Ass? I have done so much for you! I stopped doing all the things you don’t like! Like, wear skirts! Or have male friends!”

“Why don’t you go home and check yourself in the mirror? Do you know how ugly you are?”

“Do you know what is TIMING? You obviously have no clue! Now disappear!”

On local forums the identity of the three characters has of course already been discussed, but more importantly, the general consensus is that the whole thing is a con. Main argument: they don’t swear enough! Canto people do not use such ‘clean words’ when angry. Ah.. we could have known.

By reading this entire post, some of you may develop feelings of nostalgia. Others may not and would rather see something involving tits (again). Well.. if you pay attention, you’ll realize we have something in store for everybody. Most of the below has been made possible by these guys, heroes to most locals as they provide more malls and restaurants. We’d hate them, if it wasn’t for the catchy tune accompanying that flash animation. Here goes: (more…)