What could be more appropriate as a topic for TDS on the first Monday of 2010 than the dangers of the internet? From the 1998 website of the Standard we were able to receive Hong Kong Family Welfare Society senior manager Eunis Vu Kit-teng’s wisdom on the virtual world this morning (page 5). Traps for kids include cyberbullying, privacy violations, compensated dating, prostitution and drugs. Gone are the days that surfing could merely result in online game addiction! Nowadays our youngsters run the risk of a (psychological) ketamine addiction which can only be funded through compensated dating, all because of the evil web.

The story in the Standard features a tragic example, as a woman surnamed Chiu got nightmares due to cyberbullies: “I was deeply troubled by the attacks. I even had nightmares in which I came under attack in online forums even after I was dead.”

That’s right reader. There is only one thing worse than cyberbullying, and that’s post-mortem cyberbullying.

Miss Vu urges parents to pay more attention to their children’s online activities and needs. Their needs ey? Indeed mum, if only you had increased kikimushr00m’s allowance she wouldn’t have resorted to such measures. Responsible as we are, we’ll throw in a recommendation as well: block thedarkside.hk on ALL computers at home, NOW. 2010 promises to be an excellent year for anything related to drugs, prostitution and gambling, whereas there are still plenty of douche bags, socialites and politicians to make fun of – which could give your offspring all sorts of ideas. We warned you. No? Alright then. Girls, here’s a tip from our (wet) dream girl of 2009, Chrissie Chau. Wanna be as skinny as her? Easy, just don’t eat – all day long. Courtesy of our cnngo.com friends.

Have a great week folks.